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Posts Tagged ‘Match.com’

Happy New Year People!

It feels like the last time I stopped by here was the beginning of 2017, but that can’t be right. Can it?  I actually think I made an appearance mid-year (when the boy graduated from high school!), but the year was such a whirlwind of activity it’s hard to remember.  Thank goodness for archives.

While I am no longer consistent in writing here, I am consistent in reflecting briefly on the year that has passed. 2017 was everything I thought it would be and truthfully much, much more.

When I started this blog, a long time ago, it was because I had just been dumped by a guy I thought was supposed to be the one.  When I look back on that I can’t for the life of me figure out why I thought he was supposed to be the one.  But jeez I was so sad when he dumped me.  I read some of my old posts and cringe at just how sad I was.  Really?  Ugh.  Enough already.  Once I got through that transition however the blog became all about running and online dating.

Match, Tinder, Plenty of Fish, the hook-up one whose name I can’t recall right now. Oh my goodness that was a train wreck too.  I hadn’t dated much before I got married the first time, so really after my divorce, and then my subsequent dump by that one dude I mentioned above, I lost my mind with the dating and joined a bunch of sites.

I was on Match for a little less than two weeks. And lucky for me Blue Eyes got in under that wire.  With respect to my relationship with this man I’m lucky in a lot of ways.  We would have never met without the help of Match.  We lived a good distance from each other and none of our circles would have ever crossed.  But even if they had crossed Blue Eyes is so shy that had he noticed me, he wouldn’t have spoken to me – and truthfully, had I noticed him it wouldn’t have been because I was attracted to him – he was not my type.  At.  All.  My how things change.  He’s definitely my type now.

I met Blue Eyes through Match.com 6 years and 5 months ago. I dumped him a couple months later because he was too nice.  Again, lucky for me, he didn’t let that stop him.   He’s still the nicest man I have ever met.  Thoughtful, kind, funny and truly my favorite person in the whole wide world.  As it turns out “nice” is not such a bad thing to have in a partner.

Our wedding was a week shy of the 6th anniversary of when we met.  It was a good day.  The weather was perfect, our children and extended family were happy, there was enough food and drink for all who showed up and finally we were married and everyone knew it.  A good day.

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We moved into our house at the end of August. That was pretty spectacular – and difficult — it was an adjustment that we are still working through.  Our youngest children live with us.  They’ve never had step siblings; we’ve never had step children and I’ve never had a daughter.  Five months later I’m happy to report we’re doing well, but we are still adjusting.  It’s been a roller coaster and some days have been worse than others, but we’re figuring it out together and I feel like we’re ahead since all four of us actually like each other.

In October we went on our official honeymoon. We took 23 days and visited Greece, Italy and Paris.  Most people we have had conversations with about the trip refer to it as “the trip of a lifetime.”  I can’t tell you how I loathe that term.  The trip was amazing, yes.  But “the trip of a lifetime” implies that we will never take a trip like it again and on that I call bullshit.

When I was dating I would always ask the guys “If you could go anywhere in the world where would you go?” I thought it told me something about them.  Blue Eyes’ answer was Greece, a place I’d never even considered – my answer was, and has always been Italy.  So we compromised and did both for the honeymoon.  We hit Paris only because we were “over there” and it was easy to route our way through Charles De Gaulle on the way home, and also because . . . “why the fuck not?”

It goes without saying I loved Italy, but jeez Louise I loved Greece! Of course by the end of ten days in Greece I had seen enough crumbling 2000 year old buildings to last me a lifetime, but the blue, blue water, the sunny, warm weather, the super friendly people and the amazing food got me through.

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And Italy? Um yeah.  It was Italy and it was fabulous too.  We spent time in Rome, the Cinque Terra, Florence and Venice.  My favorite things we did over the course of the whole honeymoon were in Italy.  Hiking from Monterosso to Vernazza, taking a hot air balloon ride over Tuscany at sunrise, simply existing while in Venice.  Seriously, it was the best.

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And then there was Paris. It was a whirlwind time in Paris – two nights but only one complete day.  Blue Eyes figured out we walked about 15 miles on that one complete day in Paris.  We took a cab to Pere Lachaise Cemetery shortly after they opened, spent a couple hours there and then walked everywhere else.  We didn’t get back to the hotel until late into the evening, exhausted and seriously ready to go home.  But it was a good time.

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Anyway, we got back home after 23 days and were happy to be home, but we’ve already started planning our next trip, because there is always some place to go. Always.

In December we traveled south to see the Foo Fighters. Best concert.  Best.  If I sound surprised by that it’s because I am.  Not because I’m not a Foo Fighters fan, I am, but it was just so good.  So good.  My husband likes to go to concerts.  He loves live music – in fact that was one of the things his profile said on Match.com and it was true.  I like concerts too, but I like to spend money on traveling, not concerts so when he says “So and so is coming to town.”  My reaction is generally lukewarm, but bless his heart, he has not let my lukewarm response stop him from buying tickets, and he’s taken me to see some of the greatest concerts — I consistently walk away going “OMG that was so awesome!”  In 2017 we saw Tom Petty a few weeks before he passed, the Eagles and the Foo Fighters.  We also went to see Chris Rock’s Blackout tour.  It was quite a year.

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So I’m thinking . . . here’s to another great year hanging out with my favorite person.

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I wish you all good health, prosperity and lots of laughter.  I hope 2018 gives you everything you need – I have a good feeling about it!!

Be well people!

 

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Feels like I’ve abandoned this blog, however I think simply not having time for it is more accurate.  Life is busy.  Life is good. 

This blog was started from sadness.  I thought the love of my life had just dumped me and I wasn’t sure I was going to survive it.  This blog gave me an outlet and anonymity.  Fabulous strangers told me they understood and sympathized with me. 

Somehow I moved beyond the sadness and spent a lot of time dating a lot of people.  Sometimes there was no date.  Only sex.  It was an interesting period and I cringe at some of my memories, laugh at others and am grateful for most.

I joined Match.com at the very end of July 2011.  It was such a yucky experience that my profile only stayed visible for 11 days.  I met a lot of jerks in 11 days.  Blue Eyes and I exchanged phone numbers during those 11 days but he didn’t actually contact me until after I’d shut my profile down.  I was so jaded and skeptical and sick of wasting my time when he asked to get together I said no.  He asked again and to get him to leave me alone I made our first meeting very difficult on him, with ridiculous location and time specifics.  I told him I only had 27 minutes to spare and if he was late it was his problem, not mine.  None of this phased him.

After that first meeting we dated for awhile and I decided he was too nice.  Too nice.  I broke up with him three months after we started dating because he was too nice. 

Six weeks later he called me out of the blue and asked me out.  Life has been pretty spectacular since that moment.  Ups, downs, twists and turns but spectacular nonetheless.

He has been my husband for a little over a year, yet our wedding is 27 months away.  We do not live under one roof, yet we spend every possible moment together.  I wouldn’t suggest this course of action to anyone, but it works for us right now.

My very best girlfriend took some photographs of us recently.  As I scrolled through them I saw how this lovely man looks at me, how I look at him and what love and happiness looks like, despite the day to day trials of life.

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I love this man and all of his niceness.  Despite my personal feelings about Match.com I will forever be grateful that they made “us” possible.

Be well people!

xoxo

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