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Posts Tagged ‘tattoos’

For the last couple of days I’ve been thinking about NOT running the Boring Marathon. I’m not firm on that thought, but I’ve been thinking about it.

It’s an incredibly busy time at work, my school work load is high, having both of my boys in the house adds additional work and I just don’t know if I can successfully pull off training properly to run in 2 months. I haven’t been running what a training plan says I should, and when I do get out there I just want to run and not think about my time, distance, etc. I just want to enjoy running for the sake of running.

But a part of me says fuck it. Just do it.

I had originally planned to run Portland because RunnerGirl wanted me to since she’ll be back to do it again. While I love Portland, I don’t love the Portland Marathon and I won’t be running it. It’s too expensive for me and it always rains when I run it and I’d hate to bring rain unnecessarily since it was perfect and beautiful running weather last year. Instead I’ll stand on the sidelines and cheer as she passes and then Blue Eyes and I will meet her and her husband at a bar to drink alcohol. It’ll be better than last year because I wasn’t drinking when they were here. It’s safe to say that is not what’s going on in my life this year and I’ll be about the beer.

MeNK

My bestie and I live in the same town but have a hard time getting together with kid responsibilities, work, life. We try to get together once a month without fail and last night was the night. We hit McMenamins Roadhouse so I could get my hands on a bottle of their Sunflower IPA. I love Sunflowers and I love IPAs, so this beer was made for me. It’s only around for this month and it isn’t available on tap, only in the bottles AND they only had two bottles left. So I bought a bottle, but I drank something else while we were there.

MeNbottle

After we left the Roadhouse we went to Sasquatch Brewing. Blue Eyes and I went to this place last week and had the BEST experience. The waiter was cool, the place was cool, we were there for a couple of hours during the late happy hour and really enjoyed ourselves. It was really pleasant. I couldn’t wait to go back. Sadly, aside from the fact that I was hanging out with my bestie, the experience last night sucked. The waitress was a bitch with a nasty attitude and the bartender was even worse. We still had a good time, because that’s what we do, but it really soured me on the place and I’m not sure when I’ll want to go back. We are not lacking in Breweries and Taprooms in this area so there is no need to revisit a place that left a poor taste in my mouth. The beer I had at Sasquatch was a 10.2% ABV. Kinda left me needing to go home.

sasquatch

So in addition to beer being a friend and just wanting to run for the sake of running, I’m debating the marathon.

This may sound weird. It sounds weird in my head. BUT I’m going to run long tomorrow, 17 or 18, and see how it feels. When I get back I’m going to go to a 7 a.m., Bikram class and meditate on how the long run felt and whether or not I should run Boring. I know. It’s weird, but I think the yoga in the hot-as-fuck-room will help clear my mind. And while truthfully I may not be able to think about the marathon as I’m in the room, my mind will be clear when I leave and I can contemplate it on the way home.

In other news…. I got my second tattoo. A sunflower. For those of you following along you know my first tat, a running chick, is on my left shoulder. That didn’t hurt really. I mean yeah, it hurt a little initially, but it didn’t really hurt. This one? Um, well, yeah. It hurt. A lot. Two days later and it still hurts, but I love it so much I don’t care about the pain. I love my tattoo artist and what she does — and this tat is fabulous.

Tat #2

So that’s what I’ve got going on.

I hope you’re all having a lovely weekend and the weather is great where you are. It’s fantastic here in the Pacific Northwest and I’m loving it.

Peace!

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It’s a beautiful day.  Portland is experiencing a perfect fall day with sun, blue skies and a high temperature of 73 degrees (and tomorrow they are promising 80!).    

 

Today marks 21 days of no contact with B.  Fabulous. 

 

Never thought I’d be able to say that.  I feel so weak with respect to him, but 21 days is the closest I have ever gotten to my goal of 30.  Thirty being a number I pulled out of thin air.  Somehow I believe if I can go 30 days with no contact I will have reached a monumental moment in which I believe I have made some progress in moving beyond my heartache.

 

Other things are on my mind and keeping me happy.

 

The 40th running of the Portland Marathon happens in 11 days.  I am excited to be a part of that!  I probably won’t run Portland again since there are a million marathons all over the world, not to mention thousands in my little corner of the country, and it’s simply not necessary to run the same marathon over and over again.  Not to mention the  hype for the Portland Marathon is a bit ridiculous.  While I can appreciate the hype, I prefer events that are more about the run.  But I’m a Portlander and I’m a runner and it is simply blasphemy not to run the Portland Marathon at least once. 

 

***

 

In 12 days I will begin my 3rd quarter Master Cleanse.  I do it 4 times a year, once a quarter.  I always think I’m going to do it in September, but I generally have a run I’m training for to occur in October and can’t risk screwing up my training with no food for 10 days.  So immediately following the Portland Marathon it’s all about the lemonade. 

 

My mother introduced me to The Master Cleanse about 5 years ago.  I struggled through at least 5 attempts to make it the whole 10 days before I actually accomplished the task, but now it’s pretty simple for me.  I look forward to not being consumed with food.  What to buy, what to cook, what to eat. 

 

You have no idea how much time you spend thinking about food until you aren’t eating food for a good number of days and don’t have to think about it at all.  It gives you a lot of time to think about much more significant things.  It clears your mind while it cleans your body and it resets my soul.  I always look forward to it.

 

While I’m on the cleanse I still buy food and cook for my kids, but their needs are simple and don’t require much thought.

 

***

 

In 13 days I will be getting my tattoo!  I am beyond excited about that.  I cannot wait!  The guy I’m dating has a blue star tattooed on his leg.  It’s representative of the Cowboys, that he loves, but it’s pretty nondescript.  He and my oldest son have helped fuel my excitement over the tattoo.  My son is counting down the days (58) until he turns 18 and he can get HIS tattoo (a Jimi Hendrix quote), but in the  meantime, he’s vicariously living through me.

 

I may, possibly, get my bellybutton pierced on the same day.  I’m still undecided.  I’m simply afraid of the pain.  Tattoo pain does not worry me.  The piercing does.   A couple of weeks ago my oldest son told me he was going to get his nose pierced on Sunday.  While I thought it sounded ridiculous for HIM, that’s another piercing I’ve considered.  (Not so I can have some big obnoxious thing sticking out of my nose, but I always notice and like the little tiny sparkly nose piercings.  The ones you almost miss, except for the sparkle.)  When I mentioned this to him, he told me to come with him and we could get it done together.  For a split second (possibly 3) I considered it, but then I told him I couldn’t fathom the pain and would have to decline.  He apparently hadn’t considered the pain, and once I started talking about it he decided maybe he wasn’t ready for that either. . . so his nose is still hole free.  Clearly, if he had gone home to his father’s with a nose piercing I would have been attacked for my lack of good judgment as a parent, so I dodged a bullet that weekend.

 

***

My regular mantra sounds something like “I am happy, healthy, grateful and content.”   

 

Right now, I am in a good place.  I’ve been in this place before and I’m always happy to find myself in it again.  I have, many times in the past, spent a good portion of this time worrying.  About everything.  Trying to figure out what is going to happen to make this good place slip away.  

 

A few days or weeks ago I read something on a friend’s blog (http://jenniferlynch.wordpress.com/) that seemed pretty simple.  Not quoting exactly, she said why choose to spend time thinking about how things are going to go wrong.  Instead, why not choose to spend time thinking about how everything is going to turn out perfectly. 

 

When I read it I thought, yea, why  not?   I have been trying to keep my train of thought on that track ever since.  Every day is not successful, but it’s getting easier, the more I work at it. 

 

I’m in a good place, and for however long it lasts, days, weeks, months, even years, I just want to be present to enjoy it. 

 

 Have a great day!

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Been thinking about a tattoo lately.  I don’t have any currently.  My body is 100% ink free.  In the weirdness that is the city I live in, I am quite literally in the minority.  

When I was married my (now ex) husband and I talked about getting tattoos periodically.  He had some delusional idea that his arms were muscular enough to sport one of those tribal bands — he seemed to think it would make him look even cooler than he already thought he looked.  While I wasn’t super hot on the idea of a tattoo, I figured it would be a nice “couple” thing to do.  It seemed to make him happy that I was willing to go along with it.

Lots of my friends had butterflies on their ankles, or flowers in the small of their backs, all cute and feminine, but not exactly what I wanted, because I didn’t know what I wanted or even IF I wanted a tattoo. 

Now that I think about it, my ex and I talked about getting tattoos for years, because we first started going into tattoo parlors to “look around for ideas” in San Francisco.  We left San Francisco  almost 20 years ago.  Geez.  That’s a hell of a long time to talk about doing something that never gets done.

Now we have an almost 18-year-old who is counting down the days (107) to when he does not need our permission to get a tattoo.  He’s been thinking about it and talking about it for the last 2 years.  He’s serious.  More serious than his father and I ever seemed to be —  

While I may have toyed with the idea while I was married, I have been slightly  preoccupied for the last year about a tattoo, and getting my bellybutton pierced.

To be honest, the belly button piercing is not a new idea.  I had that urge while I was still married.  The ex thought it was a great idea.  It would be sexy.  Something he could tell his friends about, even have me show them.  He really liked that idea.  I’m sure his liking the idea is what caused me not to do it.  That, coupled with how painful I imagined it would be.

But here we are, about 3 years later and I’m pretty sure both will happen by the end of the year.

I am a different person than I was 3 years ago.  Quite different.  I can be who I want to be without discussing why.   Really, that’s not correct.  I’m more than willing to discuss why, good conversation  is high on my favorites list, but I do not have to feel threatened by the discussion.  Those days are over.

As an aside I would like to say that my marriage was dysfunctional.  While it lasted a long time, we were very young when we got together and neither one of us knew what the hell we were doing –that being said, while I may sound bitter at times, I still very much believe in marriage and recognize that a healthy marriage would not put me in a place where I would feel threatened in a conversation. 

So after going into a multitude of tattoo parlors around my strange and weird city, and perusing what seemed like thousands more websites for the last year, I met with Tanya, the belly dancing tattoo artist, today.  Have you ever met a belly dancing tattoo artist?  Coolness to the 10th power.

I spent about 30 minutes with her talking about what I wanted, why I wanted it, where I wanted it, how long it would take, how much it would cost, yadda, yadda, yadda.  It was pretty awesome and I was happy to leave the deposit and schedule my appointment for October 12th.  That will be the day I get a tattoo.  For me.  Because I want to.

No butterflies, no rainbows, no little flowers.  While I like all those things, they are not me.    Instead, I will have a very basic, but oh-so-cool, runner chick on my left shoulder-blade, that will be especially visible when I run.  

I am excited and only a little sad that it will be 3 days after I run my next marathon.  But it is sure to be healed and ready for display when I do the half marathon trail run two weeks later. 

In my fantasy world, where I actually have conversations with my ex-husband, I ask him when he thinks he’ll get around to that tribal band around his bicep.  “Any day now, I just talked to a tattoo artist last week, he’s drawing up a unique one-of-a-kind design just for me” is what he would say.  “Nice,” I’d say as I turned to run away from him, with my tattoo clearly in sight. 

That’s right asshole.  I quit talking about what I was going to do and started doing it right after I told you I wanted a divorce. 

Now, to find some place clean where I can get my bellybutton pierced.  I think I’ll ask my belly dancing tattoo artist if she has any suggestions.

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